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Old 24th Feb 2006, 18:46   #1 (permalink)
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From another site..

SUBJECT: Osama's Internal Memo


FROM: Bin Laden, Osama.


TO: All Al Qaeda Fighters.


SUBJECT: The Cave



Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours recently but we've really come together as a group and I love that!

However, while we are fighting a jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave, and frankly I have a few concerns:

First of all: While it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we should be even more concerned about the dust in our cave. We want to avoid excessive dust inhalation, (a health and safety issue) - so we need to sweep the cave daily. I've done my bit on the cleaning roster... Have you? I've posted a sign-up sheet near the cave reception area (next to the Halal toaster/griller).

Second: It's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to scare the hell out of most of the world's population, okay? That means that while we're taping, please do not ride your scooter in the background or keep doing the 'Wasssuuup' thing. Thanks.

Third: Food. I bought a box of Cathedral City cheese recently, clearly wrote "Ossy"
on the front, and put it on the top shelf of the fridge. Today, two of my cheese slices were gone. Consideration. That's all I'm saying.

Fourth: I'm not against team spirit and all that, but we must distance ourselves from the Infidel's bat and ball games. And Please - do not chant "Ossy, Ossy, Ossy. Oii Oii Oii" when I ride past on the donkey. Thanks.

Fifth: Graffiti. Whoever wrote "OSAMA F**** DONKEYS" on the group toilet wall, it's a lie. The donkey backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain.

Sixth: The use of chickens is strictly for food. Assam, the old excuse that the 'chicken backed into me, whilst I was relieving myself at the edge of the mountain' will not be accepted in future. (With donkey's there is a grey area).

Finally, we've heard that there may be Western soliders in disguise trying to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them. First patrol will be Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar and Dave.


Love you lots, Group Hug. Os.

PS - I'm sick of having "Osama's Bed Linen" scribbled on my laundry bag.
Cut it out, it's not funny anymore.
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Old 24th Feb 2006, 19:06   #2 (permalink)
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Very good

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Old 24th Feb 2006, 19:26   #3 (permalink)
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Hehe
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Old 24th Feb 2006, 23:08   #4 (permalink)
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Ha Ha Ha very good
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Old 25th Feb 2006, 09:06   #5 (permalink)
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Laugh How do you get coffee out of your keyboard???
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Old 4th Mar 2006, 18:06   #6 (permalink)
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Omar, Muhammad, Abdul, Akbar and Dave.
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Old 4th Mar 2006, 18:12   #7 (permalink)
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Hey Roy...off topic here but did you get your car(Hiace) fixed after..??? What was the problem M8..???
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