I hope these don't offend anyone.
B
A man is on his way home after a night at the pub and he is suddenly overcome by a violent urge for a dump.He cannot find a proper facility so he looks around to check that nobody is looking and then hops over a garden wall and into some bushes.
Down come the trousers, and the sense of relief is tremendous.
After he has finished he looks around for the end result, but nothing is to be seen.
The man is most worried about this but after a brief survey of the immediate area he decides to go home and return in the morning when daylight will enable a more investigative search.
When he returns there is a man wandering around the garden. Some what apprehensively he says, "Hello."
"What do you want?"
"Oh nothing I was just passing."
"Oh, well I suppose that's OK then. Only you can't be too careful these days."
"Why is that?"
"This used to be a good neighbour hood but it's started to go down hill."
"What do you mean?"
"Well people do some terrible things round here. You know what someone did last night? They shat on our Tortoise."
Another old joke
